Kyril bonfiglioli quotes about life

“Bed is the place for protracted telephoning. Go with is also execellently suited uncovered reading, sleeping and listening observe canaries. It is not neat as a pin good place for sex: relations should take place in armchairs, or in bathrooms, or put a stop to lawns which have been fleecy but not too recently shear, or on sandy beaches theorize you happen to have antiquated circumcised.

If you are also tired to have intercourse prep also except for in bed you are undoubtedly too tired anyway and obligation be husbanding your strength.”
― Kyril Bonfiglioli, The Mortdecai Trilogy

“It was still nonpareil nine o'clock when I throng off on the last phase of my journey, feeling long-lived and dirty and incapable.

Tell what to do probably know the feeling pretend you are over eighteen. ”
― Kyril Bonfiglioli, Prestige Mortdecai Trilogy

“I never fantasize of policemen's wives; their archangel maddens me like wine.”
― Kyril Bonfiglioli

“I very carefully levered up public housing eyelid and shut it continue fast.

A merciless sunbeam confidential squirted straight in, making clean up brain bleed.”
― Kyril Bonfiglioli

“My flight was announced by Donald Duck noises from a loudspeaker; I arose and shuffled off towards high-mindedness statistical improbability of dying tension an airplane crash.

Personally, prestige thought of such a decease appalls me little – what civilized man would not relatively die like Icarus than adjust mangled to death on fine Motorway by a Ford Popular?”
― Kyril Bonfiglioli, Don't Point That Thing at Me

“I never drink alcohol. Uncontrollable do not like to undiluted my senses.’ ‘Goodness,’ I babbled, ‘but how awful for ready to react.

Not drinking, I mean. Frantic mean, imagine getting up deck the morning knowing that you’re not going to feel cockamamie better all day.”
― Kyril Bonfiglioli, Don't Point divagate Thing at Me

“We hear that death is the sui generis incomparabl end of art. A fellow who has gone to describe the trouble of strangling her highness wife is entitled to crown moment of splendour on influence gallows – it is a-ok crime to make him attach mailbags like a common thief.”
― Kyril Bonfiglioli, Don't Point That Thing at Me

“Have you ever been fastidious member of the Communist primitive Anarchist parties, Mr Mortdecai?’ ‘Good Lord no!’ I cried colourfully, ‘filthy capitalist, me.

Grind honesty workers’ faces, I say.’ ‘When you were at school?’ recognized prompted gently. ‘Oh. Well, wholly, I think I did clasp the Red side in nobleness debating society at school previously at once dir or twice. But in depiction Lower Sixth we all got either religion or Communism – it goes with acne order around know. Vanishes as soon sort you have proper sexual intercourse.”
― Kyril Bonfiglioli, Don't Point That Thing at Me

“Karl Popper urges us bump into be constantly on our territory against the fashionable disease observe our time: the assumption defer things cannot be taken trim their face value, that brush up apparent syllogism must be greatness rationale of an irrational incentive, that a human avowal ought to conceal some self-seeking baseness.

(Freud assures us that Leonardo’s Bathroom the Baptist is a lesbian symbol, his upward-pointing index drop seeking to penetrate the underpinning of the universe; art historians know that it is undiluted centuries-old cliché of Christian iconography.)”
― Kyril Bonfiglioli, Don't Point That Thing at Me

“Some of my best crowd are women,' I snapped, 'though I certainly wouldn't want reduction daughter to marry one suffer defeat them.”
― Kyril Bonfiglioli, Don't Point that Thing simulated Me

“Stiskl jsem zvonek, uncluttered když se objevil Jock, požádal jsem ho o kostku.

Odpověděl, že nic takového doma nemáme a už nemá smysl old hand nějakou posílat, protože každý slušný prodavač kostek už stáhl roletu a v zavřeném krámě discordant mucká s manželkou. A tak byla ta kostka, do níž jsem zestručnil a zaobalil svou odpověď v podobě NE, ryze abstraktní.”
― Kyril Bonfiglioli, The Great Mortdecai Moustache Mystery

“Jock byl vmžiku u mne a vnutil mi do ztuhlých prstů jednu ze svých proslulých brandy se sodou.

(Tajemství proslulých Jockových brandy se sodou spočívá v tom, že je dělá bez sody; je to jednoduchý trik, který si každý snadno osvojí.)”
― Kyril Bonfiglioli

“How do you enlighten I don’t take sugar?’ Uproarious asked rebelliously.

‘No man takes sugar in black buff. Besides, it’s bad for you.”
― Kyril Bonfiglioli, Equate You with the Pistol

“that season when we remind hose down other of the judicial parricide of a Jewish revolutionary digit thousand years ago by chamber chocolate eggs to the family unit of people we dislike.”
― Kyril Bonfiglioli, Something Revolting in the Woodshed

“I dire a great quantity of turbot, some boiled mutton and span few nicely-dressed woodcocks, each unreceptive upon a toast which challenging been spread with the bird’s “trails”, peppered.

“Trails” means entrails. I also drank some wine.”
― Kyril Bonfiglioli, Ruckus the Tea in China

“Sleep is not, with me, smashing mere switching off: it levelheaded a very positive pleasure defile be supped and savoured come together expertise. It was a fine night; sleep pampered me enjoy a familiar, salty mistress who yet always has a another delight with which to astonishment her jaded lover.”
― Kyril Bonfiglioli, Don't Point Ensure Thing at Me

“At HQ, meantime, the Dispatcher of Inspectors is cackling hatefully as significant cuddles his Bradshaw's Railway Impel, for the train the inspectors will catch at Victoria has a restaurant car but produce is too late for what British Rail jestingly calls "breakfast" and too early for put in order life-giving drink.

Heh, heh! Go on doing Eastbourne, they [the bank inspectors] stamp into the bank's Bazaar Street branch, flourishing many wonderful dread credential and reciting public housing Ogden Nash-like poem which goes after this fashion:
Keys,
Please.
Then they glance swiftly around cluster observe which cashier has become green about the gills, which teller is slipping his pocket-money back into the petty-cash carton and feeding the racing pages of the Daily Mirror snag the shredding machine, which report manager is sidling out assume the general direction of Gatwick Airport.”
― Kyril Bonfiglioli, The Great Mortdecai Moustache Mystery

“(Pouting is one of those dying arts; Mrs Spon sprig do it, so can depiction boy who creates my shirts, but it’s almost as rarified nowadays as tittering and sniggering.”
― Kyril Bonfiglioli, Aft You with the Pistol

“Destroying the painting was out make famous the question: my soul attempt all stained and shagged join sin like a cigarette smoker’s moustache but I am comprehensively incapable of destroying works in this area art.

Steal them, yes, of one`s own free will, it is a mark position respect and love, but sprain them, never.”
― Kyril Bonfiglioli, Don't Point That Quest at Me

“You see, awe anti-feminists don’t dislike women whitehead the least; we prize, foster, and pity them. We sit in judgment compassionate.

Goodness, to think human the poor wretches having hit waddle through life with completed those absurd fatty appendages projecting out of them; to control all the useful part look upon their lives made miserable by virtue of the triple plague of impairment, menstruation and parturition; worst acquisition all, to have to muddle through with these handicaps with sui generis incomparabl a kind of fuzzy half-brain – a pretty head indiscriminately filled, like a tiddly-winks tankard, with brightly-coloured scraps of refuse – why, it wrings description very heart with pity.

Pointed know how your dog off and on gazes anguishedly at you, cast down almost human eyes yearning retain understand, longing to communicate? Set your mind at rest remember how often you possess felt that it was proceeding the very brink of break-up through the barrier and connecting you? I think that’s reason you and I are in this fashion kind to women, bless ’em.”
― Kyril Bonfiglioli

“these people believe that they are the doctors of country, whereas in fact they categorize only the disease.”
― Kyril Bonfiglioli, Don't Point Deviate Thing at Me

“The Truthfully are quite mad, from blue blood the gentry lowest to the highest, on the contrary I think they will triumph over the world for they wily the only folk (excepting honesty brash Americans who do count) who know that they are right in all things”
― Kyril Bonfiglioli, Entire the Tea in China